Monday, April 14, 2014

You would think I would know better by now

But you would be wrong.

I passed up an opportunity to apply for a transfer / promotion at work. I talked myself out of applying because it was in the same building (i.e. no change in commute), I wasn't sure I'd like the new work, and, deep down, I was afraid of failing because I had convinced myself there was no way I'd be hired over [at least two applicants I knew who had been there longer].

And then a good friend of mine who had been in the system exactly as long as I had, applied, and got it.

I am super happy for her -- she totally deserves it and is going to be awesome. The work is definitely right up her alley whereas, for me, it would have been fitting a square peg into a round hole. (Then again, I am the square peg in my current job too.) It made me realize that I probably would have been a competitive candidate, had I thrown my hat into the ring.

I am Leaning In all over the place at work -- I have volunteered to take on new responsibilities since a co-worker left and have been rocking them (so far). But I am my own biggest obstacle to my own advancement.  See, e.g., this post. That's right, newer readers. I've done this before.

I really do believe things work out the way they are supposed to. I am not unhappy about this development. It just means I am available when the square peg opportunity arises, right?

The 33% raise would have been pretty effing sweet though.

(Yeah. That's right. That much. I know... I'm an idiot.)

Sunday, April 13, 2014

MILP #342

Mommy and the Sin City debuts here.

(Sorry for backdating!)

Sunday, April 06, 2014

MILP #341

Kate had this Roundup.
She has been all over keeping this thing going, and I am grateful.

Sunday, March 30, 2014

Sunday Bits

LF turns two years old this month. To coin a phrase: I cannot even. Can. Not. Even.

My bank did the computer equivalent of laughing at me when I tried to apply for a home equity loan. Bullshark is not deterred, but I am a little defeated and am feeling like the kitchen remodel may have to wait a few more years.

Best investment of 2013-14 has been a membership at a local Children's Museum. Like this rainy Saturday, I always have a place to take the girls where they can explore things and burn some energy. Clownfish is a little bored at the Children's Museum, so he and Bullshark sometimes go and do, and I quote, MAN STUFF. AF loves dinosaurs, so today we got a membership at a local Natural History Museum. I can see us getting good use out of that as well.

I made eggplant slices into mini-pizzas for Sunday dinner. Turns out, kids will eat it if you tell them its pizza.

Just put the final load of laundry in the dryer so I am heading to bed.    

MILP #340

Grace's first Roundup is here!

Sunday, March 23, 2014

MILP #339: Through the Years & In Her Own Words VIII

Once upon a time, say, July 2007, there was a mommy in law school named Saramel. She started the Moms in Law School roundup, and wrote the first post. She invited PtLawmom, who wrote the second, and me, who wrote the third, into the rotation. Saramel eventually quit blogging, and a quick search of my archives shows me that Ptlawmom and I alternated weeks for a while. A new hilarious hostess joined us, One New Duck, and somewhere in there we realized our status as "law students" was temporally limited, so we broadened our reach to Moms in the Legal Profession.  And then One New Duck retired.  Proto / Attorney Work Product took on hostess duties at Week #111 and is in many ways the reason the Roundup survived.   That was in 2009. A quick search of my archives tells me that Attorney At Large joined the team in August 2011, around week #216, but she took a step back a few months ago, and her blog is on hiatus. I miss her voice.

In February, 2012, Magic Cookie debuted her Roundup #239, which I described at the time as "epic," and I stand by that. I am soo not worthy. We also saw the debut of Kate #238 and  Reluctant Grownup (#245), both of whom are full on awesome in their own right. At our height of six active hostesses, it wasn't particularly taxing, and we kept it going.

But time marches on and here we are in March 2014. Ptlawmom is taking a break, and Attorney Work Product is stepping aside. I plan to continue as a hostess, but I've passed the organizing baton to Kate, and she's running with it.  New hostesses are joining -- Frenchie Flip of the Mommy and the Sin City blog, and Grace of Grace and Pressure -- and possibly some more. 

And so, the Weekly MILP (Moms In the Legal Profession) Roundup is exactly what it sounds like. We're moms. We're lawyers. We blog. And, once a week, one of our hostesses rounds it all up. I used to be (and hope to be again) really good about telling people where to go check it out each week.  Grace should have it next.

I haven't gone to the In Her Own Words well since 2011. I pull quotes from MILP blogs, hopefully out of context in a way that makes you want to click, and I call that a theme. Yep, shamefully lazy. But that summary took a lot of time.

Roundup of the week of March 16-23.

  • Full of the Dickens. Thanks children for destroying my body for life! 
  • Alice. Let's go on a nature walk. Nature is so beautiful. 
  • But I Do Have a Law Degree. I have definitely taken two steps back in my individual "career" trajectory. 
  • Daisy. Gracie caught allll the daycare germs.  
  • Kate. I need to get my "passport-type photo" all set and my gallon-sized Ziplock bag. 
  • Magic Cookie. "If we went round the moon it would not make a pennyworth of difference to me or to my work." (Ok, this post just made me too happy. I'll link to another one too.) 
  • Magic Cookie. "Now it's your turn to thank me because I'm such a good person." 
  • Grace. Damn it, Jim, etc. 
  • Frenchie.  I am not showing it to her until we set foot on the first flight. 
  • RG.  Liam proceeded on, untouched by the drama, paying attention to neither of us, holding his bloodied arms away from his body and walking uphill to the house trailing a sputtering older brother and a silent, utterly nonplussed mother. 
  • Only Three Years. My second job search is still on. 
  • Legally Certifiable.  Mostly scantily-clad girls.

I have a few new bloggers to link up and round up, but the girls are up from their nap, so I have to stop here. There may be an "edited to add"  later tonight.

Wednesday, March 19, 2014

MILP Roundup Roundup #333 through #338

Shut the front door. How did it get to be March of 2014?

The Weekly MILP (Moms In the Legal Profession) Roundup is exactly what it sounds like. We're moms. We're lawyers. We blog. We round it all up. The Roundup is hosted on a rotating basis among several blogs. And I used to be really good about telling people where to go check it out. Then I fell off the planet.

In the words of the immortal Inigo Montoya:
Let me 'splain. ... No, there is too much. Let me sum up. Buttercup is marry Humperdinck in a little less than half an hour. So all we have to do is get in, break up the wedding, steal the princess, make our escape... after I kill Count Rugen.

So, while I was getting drops of Jupiter out of my hair, the others kept the Roundup going. I have some reading to do, ya'll. Also, I'm hosting the Roundup this Sunday. Yes. That's happening.

And now, a Roundup of Roundups past.

RG has the most recent Roundup, #338, introduces the new hostesses with the mostest.

Magic Cookie rounded up March 2-9 here at #337

Kate did the week of February 24-March 2, here at #336.

Kate also did the week of February 17-23 here at #335.

RG did the week of January 13-18 here at #334.

Kate also did the week of January 6-12, here at #333.

And that catches us up to where I fell off the planet. Thanks to everyone who kept things going, and I'll give a proper welcome to the newest hostesses this weekend.


Wednesday, February 19, 2014

Is this thing on?

I can't say that I've been any more or less busy than usual. We have had some computer issues, however, which makes blogging less convenient. I'm still reading. (Yay smartphone!) I'll try to get in touch with the MILP Rounder Uppers this week and see if I can right that ship too. But for now, here's what's up.
Work continues to be ... unsatisfying. I am poised to be the new point person for an ongoing project. I'll be attending committees meetings with bigwigs and coordinating things among various departments. It is a bit more high profile, but its a largely thankless job and an enormous headache, at least according to my predecessor. But, my predecessor parlayed the 'high profile' aspect into a new position, so that's something. Also, I work with smart nice people who look out for each other, and that is not insignificant.
The kids are doing really well. Clownfish is awesome. 4th grade -- great grades, sports are going well, trumpet is going well, and he is doing a very good job taking care of his pet leopard gecko (with my help).  We do our best to have some Clownfish focused time several times each week--whether its Bullshark taking him to the gym or Clownfish and I making Sunday breakfast together. We do our best to give him some time alone without his sisters each day. That said, he helps *a lot* with his sisters and I worry whether its too much some times.  
Angelfish turned three -- THREE -- in January. She is verbal and smart and opinionated. She insists on wearing tutus and tights and loves sparkly things, but also wants to jump in mud puddles and talk about construction trucks and dinosaurs. (That is, she's the girliest tomboy you'll ever meet.) She does a little whining for attention at times, but is generally pleasant and easily redirected. She is very typically three -- she likes routine and predictability, she's undergoing a little separation anxiety, and she's very into saying potty words at inopportune moments.
Lionfish is 22 months old today. Wow. That made me sad to type. She is a very big helper -- she wants people to be happy. She'll get AF's stuffed animals off her bed, or bring a random toy to CF, and get so excited when they say "thank you LF."  She likes to help set up for dinner or to load the bag for daycare. She uses lots of little two or three word sentences (Mommy do; me do) and she asks for things that she wants by saying the name with a question in her voice (cracker? milk? apple? appooyay [apple sauce]? cookie? waffle? blues clues? outside? this? more? please?) She loves playing with her doctor toys.
The snow has just been nonstop up here and has made lots of things -- including my commute -- so much more awful than it needs to be. Here's to spring coming soon!

All right, this is about all I can reasonably pull together while procrastinating doing the dishes before Bullshark gets home tomorrow. I'll try to get back to writing more regularly.Hope all is well with you all :-)

Tuesday, December 31, 2013

Farewell 2013

My  vague goals for 2013, from my January post:

  • Take better care of myself physically:  take my vitamins, get a primary care physician and make an appointment, get to the dentist, get a regular schedule that includes time for physical activity for me, maybe run a 5k in under an hour (slight exaggeration... slight), sleep.
Been pretty good with the vitamins, saw a primary care doctor and o/b, have some appointments scheduled (dentist, & eye doctor & the "almost 40" boob scan), and ran/walked/slogged though a 5K in under an hour (haven't run since), slept better a lot of the year. Finally got an asthma inhaler so I can run more.
 Did not make time for regular exercise, and despite the preceding paragraph, I can't say I feel better now than I did this time last year.
  • Maybe lose 20 more pounds? Or not regain any of the 60? Either would be satisfactory, really.
Did really well til about April. Then gained 20 pounds. Unsatisfactory.
  • Practice self-compassion. Hat tip Magic Cookie.
Practice does not make perfect.
  • Career: have an answer to the question "where do you see yourself in 5 years" that I like.
Still working on that one. There are a few jobs, that, should they become available, I would jump at the chance to do, and would apply. But twiddling my thumbs and waiting for people to retire doesn't feel like a proactive career strategy. 
  • Get our financial house in order. 
Ummm... no.
  • Get the kids outside more. It is only January, I know, but I feel a little stir crazy already. 
We were really good with this one. We did a weekly activity through the state park service all through the Spring. Bullshark took to running 5Ks with Clownfish, and we usually hit a playground with the girls afterwards (5Ks start/end near schools or parks a lot of the time). We went fruit picking multiple times, and did weekly visits to the farm for our CSA pickups.

* * *
A lot of 2013 was just about the kids. LF went from just barely crawling in January to being a running, jumping, climbing, dancing child by December. AF went from a toddler with an independent streak to a pre-schooler who leads her classmates in various games and adventures. CF took up running, trumpet, travel soccer, and read Harry Potter.

The second thing I think of when I look back on 2013 is my commute. My commute (plus the 'you must sign in by 8:30 or you're working late or getting docked vacation time' culture) is soul-destroying. I never make it. Ever. So I work late or burn time nearly every day. Except. When the husband and kids are on school break and I work 7:30 to 4, its like a different life. There is almost no traffic at that hour. It takes 40 minutes, not 90, one-way on a typical day. I almost don't even resent leaving for work, knowing they're home and doing fun things, because I'll be home soon enough to enjoy them too. Arriving home around 4:45 and not after 6:30? All. The. Difference.  But it can only happen when Bullshark is out of school (and not on deployment). Moving to part-time (if they'd even let me) (part time is arriving at 9 and leaving at 4 -- 32.5 hours), could do it, but with the cost of daycare and the car payment, the decrease in pay really makes contemplating such a move an exercise in frustration and futility.

The third thing that consumed the year was parental health issues. Grateful to still have my parents around, but it is so so hard watching their bodies betray them. Its even worse that they handle their issues with a level of sanity, emotional maturity, and reason you'd expect from a pair of bats trapped in a paper bag.

Finally, I learned how to cook a whole lot of new/different things, especially vegetables, thanks in large part to the CSA, Alton Brown, and internet recipes.

2014 Vague Goals, maybe over the weekend.

Tuesday, December 24, 2013

I am funnier on Twitter

Or, at least, I am ON Twitter. What you've been missing, December edition.

12/1/13: Angelfish: "Apatasaurus ate the T.V. Its all gone. CF you're a bush. CHOMP. Now he's all gone. Mmm mm tasty bush. Now I'm gonna eat a tree."

12/1/13: Angelfish: "Mommy be a Christmas tree so apatasaurus can eat you. CHOMP."

12/5/13. Facebook makes me grateful that I never started that Elf on the Shelf nonsense with my children.

12/5/13. Husband just left for the weekend. He admonished me to be kind to the children & not spend money. Guess I won't beat the kids & buy a robot maid.

12/7/13. Bullshark not here to cook healthy dinner? Pantry raid / comfort food time! mac & cheese and tomato soup coming up.

12/10/13. Lionfish baby book: Version of ABC song has lots of Q & Y & the tune, and not much else. Her 'twinkle twinkle' has a few more words.

12/18/13. Morning commute also awful. I have a headache. I need a day off, stat. Also could use a unicorn that shits money.

12/21/13. Taking the kids Christmas caroling with a friend's church group, because my son won't have enough to tell his therapist in 5 years.

Benedict Cumberbatch reciting R. Kelly lyrics on Kimmel, via Nerdist. You're welcome.

Sunday, December 22, 2013

MILP #332: Not so much a theme

(Edited: #331 / week ending 12/15 is totally here!)

Roundup for the week ending Sunday 12/22.

The Weekly MILP (Moms In the Legal Profession) Roundup is exactly what it sounds like. It is hosted on a rotating basis among several blogs, listed below. We aim for Sunday posts... and sometimes, I even succeed. Not this week though. Anyway, you can always check in here and I'll direct you. Ptlawmom has it next.
  • LC has a pretty epic story of actual lawyering, and raspberries.  
  • Frenchie finds work is getting in the way of Christmas (by the way, LOVE the new layout.) 
  • Kate on the blessing (and curse?) of dogs. 
  • Magic Cookie and a bad week of New England winter. 
  • Shannon on the ambivalence toward the 2 a.m. baby call.  
  • Daisy on the holiday wars (no, not the ones fought by talking heads on the news). 
  • Alice and kid pics! 
  • Lag Liv and baby Cora pics -- so so tiny.  So is the baby. :-)
  • Izzie has plague. Yuck. 
  • RG and the Christmas food. You go girl. 
  • Full of the Dickens and the Christmas lights. 
  • AAL on practicing gratitude during the holidays.
The MILP hostesses, presently:   Butterflyfish, Ptlawmom, Attorney Work Product, Kate, Magic Cookie (CM), and Reluctant Grownup. We're awesome.   

Sunday, December 15, 2013

MILP #331

Magic Cookie got concussed, but still did the Roundup, because she rocks.\

Posting this back in time.