Overheard in Con Law

First the court starts infringing on your right to have sex with sheep, and
the next thing I know is I can't play violent video games.


* I'd try to explain the context of this comment, but I contend it stands on its own merits.

Oral arg follow-up

I didn't faint or puke.

I didn't cry and leave the room.

I didn't get all belligerent with the judges.

I didn't wow them so much I got an instant job offer upon graduation.

My partner didn't do any of those things either.

The worst part was the five minutes before we entered the room -- a few stupid butterflies got lost and found their way into my tummy.

I got some nice feedback, as did my partner. And then I went home. Didn't even feel the need to get drunk...

Basically, I don't have a "my first oral argument" war story I can tell my grand kids about. Too bad, because I think its one of those staple stories in the arsenal of all law professors. That's ok, I have time. I can make up something good before I become a law prof.

Oral Arguments tomorrow

A dialogue with myself...

Clean suit?

Check.

Spiffy shoes?

Check.

Index cards for quick reference to cases?

Check.

Thorough understanding of the standard for cross motions for summary judgment in case judge decides to quiz you?

Check.

Argument organized, written, rehearsed, polished?

Ummm....

But you've begun the argument, right?

Define "begun..."

Ok, have you at least filled out your index cards?

Well...

Have you figured out how you're going to distinguish your case from the one that pretty much destroys your argument?

Well, I thought I had, but the Prof handed me my a** in class today, so maybe not...

So shouldn't you be working on that instead of blogging?

S'pose so... ItalicsMe is such a task master. The rest of Me totally wants to go outside and play "chase the birdies" with Clownfish. Anyway, I'll report on the train wreck later in the week.

Yeah, I'd care more, but it doesn't count much toward final grade, and I'm pretty good on my feet.

Now look who is making the procrastination justifications...

Fine. Oh, and you really need to stop arguing with yourself. Get back on your meds.

Random thoughts

Clownfish had his 2.5 checkup and he did not cry or cling at any point during the examination.

Blogrolling seems to have spontaneously come back to life. (shhhh! you might scare it!)

I had a weird dream that one of my classmates was a waitress at a diner and she refused to serve me meat because it was a Friday during Lent.

I Tivo American Idol and managed to watch all episodes in less than one hour. I am doing the same this week. Tivo + bad singing + wine = a great evening. Ok, well, it beats reading con law.

Anyone else think they're setting Rick(y) Shroeder up to be the next Jack Bauer and letting Keifer take some time off?

Clownfish is doing a great job with his subject/verb matching when he speaks. He's really getting a hang of the pronoun thing. But he doesn't say "I do." He says "I am." Example: "Do you want some peas?" "Yes I am!"

End of spring break blues

What I hoped to accomplish over Spring Break:

• outlines up to date in all subjects
• spend a little time with the family
• job interview
• hit the gym
• help with some home improvement
• party on St. Patrick's day.

Really exciting plan, I know.

What I actually accomplished over Spring Break:

• helped with home improvement
• some outlining in two subjects
• three hours in the snow with Clownfish
• job interview
• *lots* of bad television at night
• naps
• a good bit of family time

A mixed bag... I feel guilty for not spending even more time with my son. And I feel guilty for not spending more time on my outlines. But only one can look me in the face with big brown eyes and say I love you, so I think the fact Clownfish won out would make me feel a little happier.

I always feel out of balance during the semester; I thought Spring Break would help me restore a little of the balance I am missing. No such luck -- Spring Break merely served as a magnifying glass.

Al Gore can blow it out his a**

Global warming?*

Yeah... right.



* apologies for the excessively trite observation regarding snow in mid-March but I was looking forward to taking the family to a Big City St. Patrick's Day parade this weekend, and thanks to the weather, it ain't happening.

Irrational fears

Everyone has a totally irrational fear, I am sure. Spiders, heights, drowning, flying, birds pecking out your eyeballs... you know, the usual.

But I have a totally irrational fear that has been troubling me lately, because its gruesome and bizarre on a level that I can't quite understand. If you're not in the mood for gruesome and bizarre, like you're reading blogs over breakfast and would prefer to read about sunshine, lollipops, and toddlers doing cute things, click away now.

* * * *

Ok, for the curious and the freaky...

I get this crazy feeling any time I am sitting someplace relatively quiet where there are other people around, but only a couple (think library, quiet cafe). I think someone is going to come up behind me and slit my throat. The image is quite vivid, lasts for a moment or two, and then goes away and I don't have the thought again for a while... sometimes days on end. But because I spend a lot of time in quiet places, it occurs perhaps more than I am comfortable with.

I thought maybe if I wrote about it, it would go away.

So am I alone in this one? Worse? Care to share?

Home Improvement

My exciting plans for Spring Break include stripping off wallpaper that was originally put up before I was born. Actually, probably about 15 years before I was born. When we bought our little house, we repainted all the rooms, but left the wallpaper in the hallway because we figured we could live with it for a while... well, 3 and half years is long enough. It was a non-offensive pattern in a neutral color, but it was dingy and old. It had to go.

Stripping wallpaper is tedious work but not especially hard. It was my first foray into this particular arena of home improvement. I'd like to avoid doing it again. So we're painting instead of papering.

Right now, my walls smell like salad dressing.

(We used white vinegar because we didn't want the toxic fumes from the stuff available at the Despotic Home Store.)

Clownfish is going to help prime -- he's so excited because he gets to wear a painter's hat and get a bit messy. There will be drop cloths and a bath involved when all is said and done.

Between a family party this past weekend, a long chat with a girlfriend whom I haven't seen in months, and this bit of home improvement, I haven't even thought about law school in three days.

I think my batteries are recharged.

So hopefully tomorrow, I can get back to the business of law school, get to work on my outlines, and stop feeling so far behind.

Overheard

Alternate title: Why I am reconsidering my desire to be on a journal next year.

Journal Editor 1 to Journal Editor 2: I wanted to say to him, "Hey asswipe, did you know that when you have a cite in a footnote, you put a period at the end of that? I mean do you even OWN a Bluebook? Because I'll buy you one with my own money."

If we have to be that upset about punctuation, well... things that make you go hmm.....

I take this opportunity to quote a classmate:

"I look forward to a world where I am judged, not by my placement of commas, but by the content of my brief."

A quiz

A multiple choice quiz to see how well readers of this blog know me:

I was in Panera Sunday because the libraries were closed and I needed to do some law school work. So I am sitting at a table near an outlet, enjoying the free wireless Internet, when a ridiculously good looking guy at an adjacent table asks if he could pass the his laptop cord under my table and use the same outlet. As I agree to this and help him pass the cord, what is the FIRST thought that occurs to me:

A) He has the most amazing blue eyes!
B) Shit, I didn't expect to actually talk to anyone ... I wish I had washed my hair this morning, or put on makeup or something.
C) I wonder if this qualifies as an easement, and if so, what kind?
D) This diversion is separating me from the yummy chocolate goodness that is the brownie I am about to enjoy.
E) None of the above. Everyone knows I don't go into Panera.

Call me a sheep

Ok... confession time.

I've never set foot in a Starbucks before today. Really. I don't drink coffee, I can get perfectly good, ordinary tea anywhere, so I never felt the need. So my Starbucks avoidance started out practical, unintentional ... then it became kind of a perverse pride issue. Like when I tell people I've never seen Titanic. It was just something everyone was doing at the time, and I wasn't interested, so I didn't.

Mild rebellions against the herd, if you will.

The joke about Starbucks opening a new location in the parking lot of a Starbucks, is cliche now. Like making fun of airplane food. Or dumb blonds. Or gunning law students.

Then the next chain-food-coffee sensation began invading like a virus. So, I stood on my quasi-principle of avoiding trendy chain food joints and never set foot in a Panera Bread.

Today, I am visiting my folks (well, they're babysitting while I do research) and I got kicked out of the public library before I finished. I needed to find a place with outlets and wireless Internet (preferably free).

So I checked into Starbucks -- two of them actually, because they were within a block of eachother. No outlets and I had to pay for wireless. Forget that. I managed to escape without succumbing to the siren call of a "tall" hot chocolate with whatever-the-f*ck-they-put-in-it that makes people call it indispensable.

Ahhh, but then I found Panera. Outlets galore. Jazz music. Free wireless. Oh, sweet marketing! It worked on me -- I spent about $12 on dinner and dessert and am a Panera convert.

Baa baa.

Profiling

I am apparently an ESTJ now.

Weird, because whenever I took the Keirsey test in the past (I have the book, just linking so you know what I am talking about), my S and N were undifferentiated, or I'd come out slightly ENTJ.

I wonder if becoming a parent changes your personality?

Or maybe it was going to law school?