MILP #188

Ptlawmom had it.  Here in two weeks.

Misc.

Thought bullets, in no particular order...

• 25 years ago today I was home sick from school watching the Challenger shuttle launch from my mom's sofa. That was the last sick day from school I took until after I graduated high school.
• Advantages of nursing:  I can't exercise yet because of the c-section.  I can't take walks outside because of the snow.  Yet I am still dropping weight like whoa.  I had slimmed out quite bit during pregnancy (excluding the belly of course).  I'm currently down maybe 40 lbs from my high weight of around this time last year.     
• I assumed that I would receive an occasional email from co-workers checking in during my maternity leave. I have assumed incorrectly (so far).
• Clownfish's school has been closed at least one day a week for snow for the last month.  He had an early dismissal and two snow days this week alone.  He's getting a little stir crazy and I am not cleared to drive anywhere yet.
• Angelfish had her two week check up last night.  She's gone from 6 lb 11 oz to 7 lb 15 oz.  Twenty ounces.  Yeah... she's a good eater. 
• Around Christmas I tweeted this:  My face is alternately flaky and dry and pimply. All red. Pregnancy hormones = great beauty. Slathered face in cream. Let's see what it does.
• Skin update today:  face is totally clear.  Hormones finally normalizing for the win!

Grateful

I remember being home with Clownfish during those first weeks and months.  I remember feeling happy. I remember the mommy bliss that comes from nursing.  I remember feeling generally grateful that he was healthy and seemed like a pretty easy baby.  I remember that 'wow, just a few short weeks ago, he wasn't in this world' awestruck feeling.

But this time I feel gratefulness and awe on a totally new level. I don't think I truly and completely appreciated what a miracle Clownfish's birth was, having never personally experienced anything else. Six years later... six years during which we survived pregnancy losses, difficulty conceiving, law school and an Iraq deployment... I have a different perspective I guess.  I am still so relieved that she is in this world.  Relief is not an emotion I remember from last time.  

Additionally, my time with newborn Angelfish is so so short.  I really want to finish my commitment to the Lucy job.  It ends in July.  I have no plan for what's next and I need one.  But I am much more conflicted about the idea of returning to work so quickly now that she's not a hypothetical baby, but really here.

Speaking of which, she's stirring.  I am going to go marvel at her.

MILP #187

The Weekly MILP (Moms In the Legal Profession) Roundup is hosted on a rotating basis between PT-LawMom, Butterflyfish, and Attorney Work Product blogs. We originally rounded up just the moms in law school, but then discovered that those women eventually graduate. Who knew? So now all the moms in the legal field (heh) are represented. We aim for Sunday posts.

Sleep deprivation is up, weight is down, and my boobs hurt.  That's me.  Here's everyone else.  Sorry its a little late... and without a theme... and I may have missed some posts.

• CM and the search for balance
• Reluctant Grownup discovers "Baking is science for hungry people."*
• Googie is exploring her options
• Lag Liv on how to blog about work
• LC and the world's worst secretary go another round.
• Suzie on where the money goes.
• LEO is back! 
• Dinei has legs, brains and guts.
• Atty Work Product on being haunted by the law school transcript.
• EH on the downside of naps
• Izzie gets more done (with a new baby) than I did in 2010.

*Quote from Jeph Jacques, webcomic artist.

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If you’d like to have your blog added to the MILP blogroll for weekly review or would like us to consider a specific post, drop the hostess(es) an email or leave a comment at our sites. Expecting moms in law school and attorneys are welcome! Hat tip as always to the “original” law school roundup — Beyond the Underground and the co-rounder-upper, Nobody! KatieLuper.

Adjusting

I respond to each little squeak and cry. If she sleeps for too long, I check to make sure she's breathing.  I love to hold her and snuggle her and talk to her and smell her. My boobs hurt because we're still working on latching consistently and she has no release valve -- when she chomps down, she's not letting go for love or money.  I am sleep deprived.  I still hurt from the c-section every time I cough.  I'm wearing yoga pants and a nursing bra and no shirt as I type this.  I am counting diapers and tracking feedings like I'm entering billables.  I feel like I can't remember a time before this was my life.

Clearly, I am the mommy of a six day old ... and I'm doing pretty well.

And yet, my daughter doesn't quite seem real yet.  I have kids.  Plural.  I find it odd to hear her name said aloud.  It is jarring.  I have occasional moments of what I'll call "late pregnancy panic" -- like whoa, the baby hasn't moved in a while ... I should drink juice and do a kick count.  I took a shower today and looked at my belly and had this moment of shock -- like whoa, there's no one in there anymore.  It made me sad.  At the same time I am so relieved that she's here and healthy and I want time to slow down. 

I want a longer maternity leave.  I need time to adjust to all of this.  
 
Also, I don't feel good about her blog name yet.  That will come in time, I guess.

MILP #186

Atty Work Product had the Roundup.

Welcome Angelfish

(This picture will eventually be replaced by a fishie.)

Born happy and healthy on Wednesday, 1/12/11, weighing in at 6 lbs 11 oz, 19 inches long.  She still thinks day is night, she can escape every swaddle known to baby kind, and she latches on for nursing like a remora to a shark.

Post c-section recovery is going nicely.  Would have posted sooner, but didn't have computer access at the hospital.  Really should get me one of them smart phones with that "internet capability" I keep hearing about.

MILP #185

Ptlawmom had the Roundup.  Here in two weeks.

Update: Still pregnant.

More disjointed thoughts...

• I've honestly enjoyed having one more weekend with the belly, and I am coughing *much* less, though still spasmodically and unpredictably and horribly and uncontrollably when it does occur.  
• No real labor signs.  Bullshark is disappointed. He was sure I'd have the baby this weekend.
• Baby is coming no later than Wed this week, though there is a possibility I'll get Tue. Tue is 1/11/11.  Awesome. 
• We're due for more snowmageddon this week, which is only a problem insofar as it makes it difficult to get Clownfish to my sister's house safely.  We'll work it out, though he may miss two or three days of school.  Hospital is close enough not to be a concern.
• I'm officially on maternity leave til March, so having an actual baby would be good right about now. 
• I have another nonstress test in the morning.
• Clownfish takes the school bus for the first time in the morning.  Since I won't be able to drive for a while post-baby, and since taking the baby out early winter mornings to get him to school just seems like a bad idea in general, we decided he should take the bus.  We're starting tomorrow to get him used to it.  School is less than 1.5 miles away.  I have promised myself I will not follow the bus.
• Bullshark is determined to nickname our daughter Monkey and he bought her the cutest stuffed monkey.  I have christened the monkey Coco, though Bullshark calls it Senior Chief (its a Navy thing).  He similarly bought Clownfish a Bear and has called Clownfish Bear since he was born.

Resked

Short version: unless I go into labor on my own, no baby tomorrow. Looking like next week sometime.

MILP #184: 2010-11

The Weekly MILP (Moms In the Legal Profession) Roundup is hosted on a rotating basis between PT-LawMom, Butterflyfish, and Attorney Work Product blogs. We originally rounded up just the moms in law school, but then discovered that those women eventually graduate. Who knew? So now all the moms in the legal field (heh) are represented. We aim for Sunday posts.

Happy New Year, MILPs!!

• Atty Work Product and Suzie hereby resolve...
• Izzy's baby has passport/visa drama. 
• Googiebaba on young love. 
• Shan is waiting for grades & waiting for semester two to start. 
• Lag Liv is ringing in the new year with billables and Biscuits  
• Jenny survived the holidays
• Sammie B, inchstones and positive motion.

If I missed anyone, I am sorry. My head is a little fuzzy and I've been pretty miserable/sick for the past few days.  Coughing all night has wreaked havoc on my sleep schedule.  I'm scheduled to have the baby this Friday.  I don't have a fancy smart phone, so news won't be in anything resembling real time.  Facebook peeps will know before blog peeps, but I do plan to post on the blog asap... probably next week sometime.  Not to say I won't post otherwise this week... but in case I don't, I wanted to say this: 

Thank you all for your support and good wishes through this pregnancy.  It has meant a lot to me.

___________________________________
If you’d like to have your blog added to the MILP blogroll for weekly review or would like us to consider a specific post, drop the hostess(es) an email or leave a comment at our sites. Expecting Moms in law school are welcome! Hat tip as always to the “original” Roundup — Beyond the Underground and the co-rounder-upper, Nobody!