Accounting

I've played in two softball games this week. I made contact with the ball three times in three at bats and actually got on base once. Sure, my hit was so shallow that another runner was forced out, but that hardly matters. I rock.

I finally started week two of the couch to 5k program I'm allegedly doing. Its been easier this week because my mom is not here. She's back next week, and Bullshark will be away. We'll see if I can keep to it.  Anyway, I've been able to run when it tells me to and just when I think "ok, really, I've got to switch to walking or something is gonna break," I hear the little notes telling me its ok to walk.  Minimal wheezing, probably because I take a few puffs off the inhaler before I go.  Clownfish walks/runs with me. Tonight, at the end of our workout, Clownfish and I each took an earbud and walked back to the car listening to his favorite songs and holding hands. Best part of my day.

Weight-wise I've been at a plateau for about two-three months. I'm happy that I haven't gained anything (playing within the same 5 pounds), but I knew I would need to add activity if I was going to lose anything more.  I really think I can lose another 20 pounds by Thanksgiving if I just keep slow and steady.  

Oh, here's a link to the actual running program Bullshark downloaded for me -- its called podrunner intervals, but I'll continue to refer to it as couch to 5k, the same way people refer to all brown fizzy beverages as Coke.

MILP #209

Big thanks to EH at Attorney At Large, who volunteered to guest host the Roundup this week.  THANK YOU!!

Here Monday (long weekend in honor of the 4th).

Crowdsourcing

1)  How do I "break in" a softball glove?

2)  I need a new camera. Digital point and shoot, compact for ease of transport with kids, at least 10x zoom (because my current camera has 3x zoom and it sucks), decent performance in lowlight and for sports a plus, price point less than $300 (preferably with all accessories, like battery and memory card).  Considering Nikon Coolpix S8100 (on Amazon for about $230).  Thoughts, other suggestions welcome.

3) Eating pepperoni pizza while making organic baby food for your daughter: best idea ever, or BEST idea, ever!

Career Post

So, by popular demand -- meaning one request -- I am going to post the career dilemma.  I tend to talk about my job in oblique terms.  This post won't be any different. But these are the relevant details. I work for a large agency with several arms.  My job last year and my job this year were each one year term positions within the agency. The position I held this year in arm X is nonrenewable.  The position I held last year in arm Y was renewable under limited circumstances, but since I was hired for the position in arm X, I didn't apply to be renewed.  In light of the (then pending) birth of my daughter, however, a few weeks into my position in arm X, I applied to Y for a position starting in fall 2011.  It was more or less unheard of to do that, but I figured, what the hell?

And... it worked.

Job "Bird in the Hand":

The top boss in arm Y is awesome. She knew exactly why I applied to return (predictable hours + job I already knew well = pretty darn family friendly position in the law).  She liked my work.  So, she took me back.  I was ecstatic, overjoyed, grateful and relieved to know what I'm doing this fall.  Plus, I'll have August off (unpaid, but the timing works out for various family/childcare/military reasons.) Y Boss can only commit to hiring me for a one year term, but there are rare (really rare) opportunities for permanent positions in the Y arm, and my odds of securing such a position increase substantially if I'm already there.  

If not, well, I had another year, and I will be eligible in that year to apply for anything else that might open up in the agency.  Regardless of what happens "In the Bush," I'm ok. Which is awesome.

Job "In the Bush":

I wrote this post about how I am a f**king idiot because I did not apply for a permanent position that opened up in arm A.  There is a possibility another position will open up unexpectedly, and if it does, it will open soon.  Potential boss in arm A asked me if I would hypothetically be interested in such a position if it opened. Hypothetically, I am interested.  Hypothetically, if the position opened and I was chosen, I'd have to have an answer pretty damn quickly.  So, here are the problems. 

Problem 1:  Summer.  If that position opened, I might have to start August 1.  Daycare, plus I'll have to try to enroll Clownfish in camp or something and compel my mom to commit to yet another month of driving up to help out on the days I don't have care for Angelfish -- in short, its do-able, but sucky.  I was frank about this concern with potential boss since we were speaking hypothetically, but there probably isn't much they could do about delaying the start date.  But ... it would only be sucky for a month. Then, I'd have a JOB. A real permanent job - job. Well, as permanent as anything is in this climate.

Problem 2:  Bridges.  Its the same agency, and people move within it all the time. Boss Y is awesome and would be understanding if a permanent opportunity came up and I took it. But, it would leave Boss Y, who has been nothing but awesome to me, in a bit of a lurch. As far as she knows, I haven't applied for anything else.  I haven't given her a heads up because, technically, I haven't actually applied for anything else.  This hypothetical job may never materialize. Or, if it does, I may apply and not get it.

Problem 3:  Distance. Its a longer drive and harder to leave if anything comes up with the kids, and Bullshark works too far away to be a viable alternative before 3 p.m.   

For comparison sake: 

• Salary/benefits: close enough to not make a difference in my determinations.
• Family friendly: Both are about as "mommy track" as you can get as far as regularity of hours (45/ week), but neither are flexible regarding working from home, or arriving earlier or staying later to make up hours.
• Commute:  Hand is much shorter, by at least 30 minutes in the evening, 15 in the morning most days.
• Coffee:  Available in both offices for a modest fee, but cheaper at Bush. 
• Personnel:  Each environment has its characters, nutjobs, whackadoos, and assholes. Probably a draw.  
• Physical work environment:  Bush is literally in a basement. Advantage Hand.
• Neighborhood:  Bush is near an awesome city park, great for the occasional lunchtime "I need fresh air" stroll with lots of options for grabbing quick, healthy meals if you forget your lunch. Hand could be one of several locations, and may be in the kind of neighborhood in which you don't walk outside without a mace. (Not like pepper spray, I mean the medieval instrument used for bludgeoning.)
• Potential for growth:  More opportunities for advancement in Arm X. Advantage Bush.
• Courtroom exposure:  about equal, but for different purposes. 
• Law:  Hard to say which I'd like more.  Like most law jobs, attention to detail, research and writing are the hallmarks of both positions.
• Hand:  wide variety of different areas of law, new stuff just about every day, frustration and flying by the seat of pants is the norm. More likely to "feel like I've made a difference." 
• Bush:  very specific and quirky area of law, lots of legal brain work and analysis in that sphere, the little that I know of the work is that it can be somewhat more routine, but with maybe higher stakes.

So there it is. 
If Bush materializes, what should I do? 
Crowd sourcing.
Go.

Softball

I attended my very first ever softball practice tonight.  It was four athletic guys, one girl who plays on two other softball teams, and me.

How new at this am I?  I had to buy a glove.  I bought a glove for lefties. I never used it before today.  Turns out, although a write with my left hand, I throw better with my right. Who knew? I borrowed another glove and played on. (Thank goodness the sporting goods store let me exchange mine -- I stopped on the way home.)

I lost the ball in the sun and got hit in the chest. I also got nailed in the arm.  Once, diving away from an inside pitch, I got hit in the finger. Oh, I also took a shot to my left boob. My left hand is sore -- a glove affords less protection than one would think.  My shoulders hurt. Gonna take some Advil. There is no crying in softball.

Everyone has a nickname or two.  Cupcakes (also Highlight Reel), Jeter (also Primadonna), Rep., Boss, MVP.

No nickname for me yet.  I'm hoping to at least avoid a moniker synonymous with failure. So far, so good. Why?  I accidentally caught the ball on at least three occasions.  I purposefully caught it more often than that, but the three occasions people cheered because the play looked good, it was more serendipity than skill.  At bat, I repeatedly made contact with the ball ... and would have effectively grounded out to first on every play.   But everyone was so happy that I was making contact.

Important life lesson:  When you set the bar low, you never disappoint anyone.

MILP #208

Atty Work Product had it. Here next week, probably late because of the long weekend.

Written, but unpublished

So far in my draft folder from tonight, I have:

• a snarky "open" letter to a co-worker who has screwed me over
• a (really rare) photo post in which I whine that I don't think I really look any thinner (which could be construed as compliment fishing, except I really don't see a difference that can't be attributed to maybe better hair).  

From recently but not tonight,  I have:

• A joke. Punchline is Weiner/Holder 2012
• A lengthy screed about my finances
• About three other versions of the "I don't think I look thinner" post
• A career update, with the attendant "OMG I have to make decisions ... and all options have consequences ... and I don't want to burn any bridges ...."

Sigh. I'm gonna have a glass of wine and wait til Angelfish wakes for her next feeding. Then maybe I'll sleep.

Aren't you glad you read this blog?

Wisdom

My life isn’t perfect. No one’s is. Sure, there are things I would change, but that doesn’t mean I don’t like what I have now. And I’m not gonna waste the prime of my adulthood sitting around wishing this or that was different. This has been your daily fuckin’ affirmation.

~ Mike, thejerkstore

Bits

On Tuesday, my mom put the family dog, Shannon, to sleep. We had her for over 12 years.  She was beautiful, a white faced husky/Shepard mix with grey and white fur and pointed ears, one of which always flopped down. She never growled and rarely barked, but she was prone to mad escapes around the neighborhood.  My dad was more broken up about it than anyone else, and it hit him harder than any of us expected.  I didn't live with the dog for long and won't pretend I was particularly attached to her.  Still, it was a sad week for the family. 

In other news:

I ate far too much Chinese food for dinner. 

The "running thing" isn't going particularly well.  I've got to get on that.  My 5k is like 6 weeks away.  I'd like to traverse it in under an hour (note: I didn't say 'run' -- I don't think I'll actually be able to run the whole thing.)

I joined a softball league at the behest of my co-workers. I've never actually played softball. Yes, really.  This should be... interesting.  Hit the batting cages tonight. For the first time in my entire life. Yes, really. I went like 2/30.  I'm awesome.

This week's moment of Mommy fail:  Saw a commercial with Bon Jovi talking about charity. It was playing snips of Bon Jovi songs.  Asked Clownfish if he knew who it was.  Thought he'd know the music for sure.  He said 'Justin Beiber'?NOOOO!

MILP #207

Ptlawmom had it.  Here in two weeks.

June

Last June was training time at the Lucy job.  I was miserable.  Due to certain quirks of the system, I had to do twice the work of other trainees in the same amount of time. I worked through lunch most days and stayed late, while the others were socializing and/or doing bar prep. I was also, unbeknownst to anyone at the job, in the early days of my pregnancy, taking hormone shots in the ass that amplified all negative feelings of panic, sadness and stress.  June 2010 was not a good time.*

I promised myself then that I would advocate for my replacement, though in such a way that it did not appear as if I were complaining about my own personal hell June.  Due, in part, to some of my advocacy and in part to some systemic changes beyond my paygrade, my replacement is going to have a much less awful month than I had.  Well, his workload is comparable to everyone else's, anyway.

Too bad, once again, I can't say the same is true for me.  There is a fixed amount of work to be done before our term ends in July.  I have picked up two huge assignments and several small ones -- enough to keep me very busy between now and the end, but not enough to cause me panic attacks.  Yet every day I feel further behind, because the idea of a fixed amount of work is illusory.  I keep getting other crazy little projects.  Stuff that not only would not have bothered me a month ago, but stuff I would have enjoyed. Now? Seeing the days trickle down on the calendar, while also seeing my work pile grow.... sigh.**

It is gonna be another one of those Junes. 

_________________________________________________
* The rest of the year was seriously awesome and I loved it. There was less stress. Time was on my side. I got stuff done without the looming threat of a drop-dead date. Oh, you know, except for the weeks leading up to my daughter's birth.  But people backed off giving me new stuff towards the end then, and just let me finish what I had. 
** Don't think I haven't considered shoveling some of it onto my replacement's desk, cuz I have.

Baby food

So I think I'd like to make Angelfish's baby food.  I have a food processor and a veggie steamer. How hard can it be?

What I don't have is a food storage system.  I'd like to use something that can do individual portions.  I need something that can be frozen and be warmed up in the bottle warmer (because that would work for the daycare down the line, especially if I'm going to insist that they don't microwave it).

Suggestions, tips, recipes, comments like "you're nuts, buy jars, it was good enough for Clownfish" and other thoughts are welcome.

Baby tricks at almost 5 months

Blows bubbles.
Makes thbbbth noises.
Can hold, remove and manipulate binky.
Sucks thumb.
Has mastered the art of the fake cry.
Still protest crys at nap time, but with extra vigor (see previous entry).
Occasionally sleeps for 5 hour stretches, at night no less!
Loves baths, walks outside, warm breezes and trees. (This is beginning to sound like a personals ad.)
Ate her first solid food (oatmeal w/ mommy milk) today -- and loved it!
Rolled over from back to stomach (also today), though she seemed bewildered by what had occurred.
Weighs in at around 16.5 pounds.

MILP #206: It is like a multi-part harmony, really...

The Weekly MILP (Moms In the Legal Profession) Roundup is hosted on a rotating basis between PT-LawMom, Butterflyfish, and Attorney Work Product blogs. We originally rounded up just the moms in law school, but then discovered that those women eventually graduate. Who knew? So now all the moms in the legal field (heh) are represented. We aim for Sunday posts.

This week, I noticed that the posts, as a whole, hit all the notes that we usually see in the Roundup.  Put together, they capture almost the whole MILP song. Take a look.

Urban living:

• Magic Cookie.  Adventures in public transportation.
• Atty At Large. Portland.

Kid cuteness:

• Lag Liv.  Happy birthday Biscuit!!  
• PtLawmom.  Pics and plans.

Working mom challenges:

• Better Together.  Food.
• In a minute.  Exercise.
• Reluctant Grownup. Time

Lawyer success:

• Legally Certifiable.  WIN!
• Googie. Run!
• Only 3 Years.  Summer associate.
• Atty Work Product:  Interview.
• Jenny. A law school A. 

About the only things missing were sex, wine and shopping.  Get on that for next week, ladies. Mwah!

__________________________________________________________
If you’d like to have your blog added to the MILP blogroll for weekly review or would like us to consider a specific post, drop the hostess(es) an email or leave a comment at any of our sites.  Expecting moms in law school and attorneys are welcome.  

Thinking of planning to have a baby while in law school?

Pregnant and in law school?

Mom going to law school?

A collection of the best advice, anywhere, from women who have been there, done that and have the spit-up stained cami under their best interview suit to prove it can be found here.


(Yes, its that post everyone contributed to back in early 2010. I saw a recent spike in searches finding this blog. Thought I'd direct them to the best one-stop answer spot that I know.) 

I am an idiot

There was a posting for Job A.  For a myriad of reasons note relevant to this story, Job A was for internal transfer only.  It was well known by everyone that they were posting it as a formality because Employee S was getting Job A.  Employee S was competent, well-liked, had paid his dues in a similar position that paid less... Job A was his.  To avoid stepping on toes, etc. I did not apply for Job A.

What I thought was a reasonable plan was to apply for Job B -- the job Employee S currently holds.  After the application period for Job A closed out, I mentioned to a boss that I was interested in Job B if and when it becomes open.  Boss' face fell.  She told me I would have been an excellent candidate for either position, and she'd love to have me.  Even though I didn't tell her why I hadn't applied, she guessed right away.  This happened to a few others who she knows were interested in Job B.  She had wanted to give us a heads up, but she didn't want to be seen as soliciting applications.  You see, unfortunately, Job B is going to be filled by the same applicant pool as Job A ... and they couldn't accept new applications. 

Boss said nice things about my work and was able to speak candidly about my future prospects because there was no chance I could get the job.  It was all nice to hear. But, in short, I am a f**king idiot.

(All is not lost -- there may be other opportunities, etc. in the future. I'm not terribly upset about it, things work out for the best, blah blah blah.... but I still feel like a f**king idiot.)

MILP #205

Proto had it. Here Sunday.